image via guardian.co.uk
According to the Genreality folks this week is theme week: reading habits.
I know I am not alone, but the plague does seem limited to those who practice wordcraft (yes, you academics can dance in this ball as well). Netflix did not invent the queue, but that is the closest most people come to experiencing our problem. My queue runneth over.
At the end of the day my browser has so many open tabs that the computer groans. My library is filled with books that have some marginalia, some dog-eared pages and a bookmark around the halfway point. There are books on the floor, on the shelves, next to the beds. I found a stack of books when cleaning out the garage. If the question is, what are Travis’ reading habits? Most people would answer that I don’t read. Sometimes I feel like I don’t.
The reality is that I do not and cannot read enough. Life gets in the way but the main impediment is writing. Writing and reading are hard. They need to be done serially.
Every morning after I leave the gym I go to a coffee shop where I force myself to read an essay and a short story. The only reason I can accomplish this is because I do not have the computer with me. After the readings I force myself to write the first sentence of the short story and then expanding out to 100 words, no fewer no less, I complete the story. It’s a good exercise that primes for me for the day of writing ahead.
Afterwards I go home, pick up the computer and find a coffee shop or a library and write. I have daily assignments and I have a larger project I am developing. The remainder of the day is an endless juggling match between those projects and the necessities of life in the US these days. At 9 I force myself to stop whatever I am doing and just read. This is the source of all the half read books. I’m fickle. Life is too short to slog through something I’m not feeling. Books being good are more about my ability to receive them and less about the author’s artifice. I give myself that luxury.
The Swede is a high school librarian and she allows herself to read what she wants all the time. It’s all research and enrichment for her vocation. She comes home and reads. Saturdays she reads. She feels no compulsion to read, which is precisely why she can read. I feel compelled and concomitantly rebel. I feel a need to read richly to improve my writing, whereas she can read for the pure joy of it.
The honest answer to the question is that she has the reading habit. For her it is an unthought necessity. As a writer it is labor and that makes me sad. Every now and then I will pick up what I consider fluff and then find that it has so much more to offer me than the masterpiece, if only because I am ready to receive it.
Why do I love this passage? Clearly I’m drawn to the lasciviousness of it. I also enjoy the function of shame. An attempt to overcome it, to transgress it is still subservient to the same forces. The way I explain it to others is the maypole analogy. People who go against the crowd and circle the other direction are still circling the maypole. The analogy does not allow any actual transgression, for walking away from the maypole is still an act structured by the maypole.